Growing Up Little

A woman exploring the world of BDSM and sharing what she discovers…

Learning About Sub Drop

on October 9, 2013

So, I have come to realize that in the past, I have experienced what is known as Sub Drop.

I’ve done a bit of reading up on it and while it seems a bit difficult to find good information on it, here is what I have learned:

  • Sub drop is a term used to describe the intense emotional and physical feelings which a submissive can suffer, as a result of a play session.
  • During a BDSM exchange, a flood of adrenalin and endorphins release into your body and brain, giving you that ‘high’ euphoric feeling.
  • During this time, the submissive is emotionally exposed, vulnerable and often can be in such a detached state of mind, the lines of reality become blurred.
  • After the spike of chemicals and hormones into your body – the submissive can ‘crash’, sometimes leaving the body in a highly imbalanced state, causing a sudden change in mood, which can be quite alarming and intense.
  • The submissive often desires to stay in this alternate reality and the thought of having to return can be devastating and cause psychological ramifications.
  • Some of these intense feelings can include:  anxiety, depression, abandonment, fatigue, guilt, loneliness, anger, and irrationality.
  • These intense feelings can be spontaneous outbursts, which the submissive has little control over.
  • The submissive may:  cry for no apparent reason, have trouble sleeping, have the desire to isolate themselves, have thoughts of leaving their partner, have an intense need to sleep, have changes in appetite, and/or have feelings of self-hatred.
  • These feelings can happen for hours, or even days after an exchange.
  • Sub drop can begin immediately after a session or it can be a delayed reaction, appearing days after an exchange.
  • Dominants can also suffer from ‘Sub drop’.

Learning more as I go…

If anyone out there has had experience with Sub drop – I’d love to hear about it, please comment below.  Thanks!

Daisy tat 12

6 responses to “Learning About Sub Drop

  1. […] What I am not familiar with however, is this form of depression or the feelings of emptiness that some describe. A few links below from a variety of people (I presume this applies to male or female) that outline their own experiences with this: […]

  2. emily says:

    I’m reading about sub drop and trying to learn about it. My question is could this be what I’m experiencing…? My Master and i don’t really “play” or “scene” in the true aspect for various reasons. I do serve Him 24/7, as much as possible, though we don’t together… We spend every other weekend together. And He comes over 1-2 times during the weeks apart. Here is what I’m wondering… Sometimes the next say after i come home, sometimes up to 4 says later i find i miss Him so much it’s overwhelming. Same thing during mid week visits….. Is this “sub drop”? Or simply an irrational need because i love Him so much? Am i just nuts?

    • No, I don’t think you are nuts.
      I’m not a sub-drop expert by any means but I have experienced it.
      Like you… Daddy and I spend very intense time together and then we are apart for usually about two weeks or so. There have been times… that – like what you described… a few days after being together… I miss him SO badly – it hurts. Eventually the intensity of missing him would dissipate.
      I started to recognize a cycle… Seeing him, being in 7th heaven, enjoying the afterglow, missing him, missing him so much it hurt… and then getting back to normal and ‘balancing out’.

      There were times, I questioned if I wanted to enter back into the cycle… because the intensity of the feelings… the missing him and wanting him… hurt so badly. Maybe I was trying to keep my heart safe?
      I don’t think that experience (the one I just described) was sub-drop.
      I think it could be classified more as being sub frenzy if anything.
      Maybe I should do some more research and write about sub frenzy too!!!

      Thanks for commenting! I love hearing from others who have experienced similar things. I think we can learn a lot from each other and realize we aren’t alone in how we are feeling.


  3. flogginfloozie says:

    I am in sub drop now…. It doesn’t happen often but it does happen. I like pain play and after an intense session – especially if i am pushed, I can drop. Most times i am high for a day or two then slowly come down. This time it hit me the night of our session and straight through today… I am weepy and feeling needy. I know this is normal so i can deal with it, i write my blog to get the feelings out.

    • Writing for sure helps.
      It’s good to read about others experiencing the same type of thing.
      It helps to understand the emotions when they are happening and to understand that it’s a ‘normal’ process.
      I know I felt a little ‘crazy’ and didn’t understand what was happening… until I learned and understood what sub-drop was all about.
      Thanks for commenting.

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