Growing Up Little

A woman exploring the world of BDSM and sharing what she discovers…

It Isn’t Ageplay


The following is taken from Masochistically Defiant.  It is an excellent description of why being a Little, isn’t age play to me.  (Note: she calls her Daddy –  “Monster”.)

It Isn’t Ageplay

I know there’s lots and lots of people out there who associate being a  “little” with ageplay. For my Monster and I, ageplay doesn’t even come close to  describing our relationship. Just for a second I am going to describe what the  term ageplay (age play, age-play) means to me. And please remember this is my  opinion, yours may be different.

My idea of what ageplay is: A person or couple that pretends to be a different age. They have a set  time for when they are going to be this certain age and maybe even dress up for  an ageplay session. When it’s all over they drop the act and go back to  normal.

Like I said, this is only my opinion on the term. For my relationship with  Monster…that doesn’t describe how we work. I hate labels, but the closest one  for me would be a non-age specific regressive little mixed with a child at  heart. But how is this different than ageplay? First, I have no idea what “age” my little side is. I always just go with mid  to late teens. Stuck at 16-ish most of the time. There’s no pretending that I am  a definite 16, it’s just how I am. Second, we never know when it’s coming. Well…the grocery store brings out  my younger side. But in a normal day, Monster can’t say, be 9. It doesn’t work  like that for me. If I am not feeling 9 I can’t act 9. Third, Monster doesn’t alter into this Daddy persona. It’s who he is. His  personality. I’ve been told by ‘nilla people, “he’s such a Daddy.” It’s not this  role he slips into whenever he wants. Same for me. I am a kid at heart. I never  grew out of cartoons, coloring books, and ribbons and bows. I still giggle like  mad when people say the names for naughty bits. It’s my personality. Him being Daddy and me being little girl is us. 24/7. No set times for when  or how or where. My little side is always there. Just under the surface. Waiting  and watching for the thing that pulls it out. A sparkle, a shine, a sound,  anything that entices that side of me to come out. If some people label that as  ageplay, so be it. I just…don’t. I like to think of us as two people with  complementing personalities.


27 responses to “It Isn’t Ageplay

  1. Daddysgirl says:

    Love this, this is just what I was looking for to help me figure my ‘little’ out 🙂

  2. gypsy116 says:

    Love this, and oh so agree 🙂

  3. Debbie A Allard says:

    I agree with your opinion. I do know my little age…I have a 5 year old that lives in my head at all times…its what makes me a good preschool teacher 🙂 Daddy loves me for me…

  4. Kenzie says:

    I get it! I get it! I get it!! *jumps up and down squealing* It’s like someone took the thoughts in my head and my heart and put them into words perfectly. I had to giggle at the “Be 9” part. Funny how some people think Littles can do that. We aren’t role playing. We aren’t acting. We just “are”. 🙂

    • Yes and it’s wonderful when we feel free to be who we are and be okay with our Little selves. It’s a wonderful feeling. Glad you liked the post. Thanks for commenting!

  5. peachie says:

    My little is who she is, all the time. I feel like I have to age-play a big-girl to be mommy and wifey. My big girl does not always want to come out and play either! But I do not believe that my 15 year-old son, who is five-foot-six by the way, is going to listen to the seven year-old version of his mother (at barely five-foot-four). LOL.

    • I can identify with that for sure!
      I often feel like I need to ‘act’ grownup… not that I AM grownup.
      It can be stressful and I’m starting to realize how it affects me in everyday life.
      My Daddy is helping me see that and helping me deal with it too.
      Thanks for commenting! I always like learning what it is like for others and how they handle similar things.

  6. Kenzie says:

    LOL Peachie, I can relate. I seriously doubt my 16 year old, 6′ son is going to listen to my 4 year old self either. That’s a great way of looking at it – age-playing a Big. Hmm, gonna tumble that viewpoint around in my head for awhile. Thanks for the new outlook!

  7. BabyGirl says:

    Reading all your commits made me cry ….. I’m not alone 🙂

  8. Joanne chan says:

    I agree completely with you. I’m a little and for it is how I am as a personality rather than a role I put on, play and take off after a few hours. There may be an overlap for some but i don’t thank age play is identical to being an adult with a kid like heat and soul.

  9. J says:

    Great post! While I don’t identify being a little by your definition I am most certainly Daddy’s little princess. However, I do giggle, ALOT, when some says the words balls or duty (especially in a professional setting). Also I will most definitely laugh at any 7th grade boy bathroom humor. So..maybe there is a “little” somewhere inside me.

  10. jasmine says:

    Like i commented b4 im new here n im with a daddy dom now n very happy n so is he but id like to comment on why its soooo hard to find daddy doms esp good ones
    B4 my daddy now i tried a few that were very abusive to me. So i gave up for a very long time

    • I’m so glad you didn’t give up forever and that you found the Daddy that is right for you.
      It can be hard to find the right Daddy but just like any other type of dating… there sure are a lot of funny fish in the sea!
      Thanks for commenting and reading!

  11. […] . . It’s not an age play thing. I don’t want to try to explain it, here is the PERFECT description.  I need to figure out how to describe it for him if I ever get the guts up to talk to him about […]

  12. Hayley says:

    I love this I have the exact same opinion, I always have a 6 year old in my head she just needs something to trigger her and off I go :3

  13. Master Wes says:

    Thanks for the wonderful blog. I am both a Master, and a Daddy Dom. I self identify as an Uncle rather than a Daddy because of the role I fill, I am a non parental family member for a number of the littles in my community. Some of them just have not found their mommies and daddies, some of them are have mommies and daddies who are in the military, or who have to be gone for extended periods for their work, some who just need someone that isn’t mommy or daddy to talk to and help them work through those things they can’t (for whatever reason) talk to their mommies and daddies about.

    I am also the Headmaster of the Yorktown Academy of Deportment, a fictional institution that occasionally comes to life in Southeast Virginia.

    I have sent several folk to this writing to help them better understand littles, you have written a wonderful explanation. I get what you are saying; I almost seamlessly slide through my roles, letting which ever part of me is needed do what needs to be done. Keep on keeping on, and never stop being 9

  14. Carolynn says:

    Me and my Daddy too

  15. Carolynn says:

    I actually thought I was alone in this “fetish” as people have called it… What they don’t get… It is mine and my Daddy’s lifestyle… My age is 11 btw 🙂 thank you so much!

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